Worst. Experience. Ever.

My worst day ever was when my slightly racist funny grandma stopped breathing and was hospitalized.

See my granddad and her had nothing in common, she'd stay up all night and chain smoke in the dark and he'd stay up all day and watch soccer, football and never said more than 2 words or showed any emotion what so ever(he's British). they took care of each other. There was love but it was more like they just lived together and loved the routine.

Well when she stopped breathing she was put on a respirator to breath for her. She was listed as do not resuscitate but the doctors gave the family the option because she was not of sound mind or something.

The family was split into two. The religious side who wanted her to live and my side with my mom. Me and my mom cared for my nan and granddad. We visited them every week and were closer to them than the rest of the family who only saw her on Christmas and get togethers

We chose to pull the plug on the respirator and there was something like a 5% chance that she would start breathing on her own.

She didn't.

My grandma layed still and she didn't breath...I normally am very good with dealing with emotions. I'm an emotional rock but I cried that day when Grandpa ran up to her and shook her yelling "Breathe Annie breathe!"

I bawled. The next time I cried was at her funeral but it wasn't until mom squeezed my hand. Ever since then I visit my mom every 3 days for coffee. We've never been closer.

I've yet to cry since then. I know I will when grandpa dies.

I miss you grandma.